Good Etiquette and Christ's Character

If we just took this passage of Scripture and used it as a template for how we behaved toward other people, what a tremendous difference it could make, standing in stark contrast to a culture that is lacking in civility so often.   In 1st Corinthians 13, we read:
4Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;5does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil;6does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;

Rude behavior comes from having the attention toward ourselves, and can result in being totally oblivious to the people around us.  If we are projecting a sense of selfishness and do not attempt to treat others with honor and respect, it does damage to the way that we are perceived, and could hurt our witness.   But, if someone meets a Christian who is friendly, polite, and radiates the compassion of Christ, that encounter can give a believer the a chance to touch a life, to make a mark, to give a good impression that pleases God and brings glory to His name.  So, in being ready in and out of season to testify to the presence of God, we take our minds off ourselves and exercise a grateful and compelling spirit toward others.

In Romans 12, we see a passage that can encourage us to live in manner that pleases God as we show honor and respect to other people:
9Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good.10Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another;11not lagging in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord;

I came across a piece on a blog by a certain cell phone manufacturer, Nokia, the other day, and it really can tell us a lot about etiquette, electronic devices, and being aware of the people around us.

The writer observed that in England, and to a certain extent, in North America, it’s perfectly acceptable to answer the phone with ‘Hello?’, or even ‘Yes?’, and then dive straight in to whatever conversation you wish to have.

He said that while visiting Egypt, he saw that people would spend the first five minutes of any conversation exchanging formal greetings and niceties that included everything from the weather to the extended family of the caller – even if they were complete strangers.  He writes, "This started me thinking: are we English just incredibly rude and abrupt when it comes to answering the phone, or is it that different countries – and different cultures – have different rules when it comes to telephone etiquette? A little research revealed that the latter is true."

There are cultural differences in the way that people answer the phone and how they regard the use of a cell phone.

For instance, In Italy, people generally answer the phone with ‘Pronto’, or ‘ready’, and it is also acceptable to simply say ‘Dimmi’ (‘speak’) – something that would certainly be considered rude by British standards. In many other European countries, including Germany and Denmark, it is normal to state your name when answering the phone, whereas in Mexico and Russia, which he says are countries with history of phone tapping and bad lines, people tend to be more wary about giving their personal details away over the phone.

In countries where mobile phones have been around a long time, it has become commonplace to see people checking their phones while doing almost anything! Phones have become a fast and easy way to stay connected to people, including social media, and it has been reported that nearly a third of American prefer texting to talking.

In countries such as India, Africa and to some extent South America, where mobile phones are a more recent development and are expanding rapidly, people tend to use their phones less for texting and more for calling people – especially any relatives that might be living far away.

But despite these differences, there are certain types of behavior that are considered unacceptable in any society. Talking loudly on the phone on public transportation, or speaking in public about private matters are frowned upon pretty much anywhere. Texting or checking your phone while talking to someone else is also considered rude, as is answering the phone in a restaurant/cinema/theatre/concert etc.

And, as a really cool infographic developed by RepairLabs states:

No matter what part of the world you live in, there is one common rule across the globe when it comes to cell phone use. It is never safe to text or talk on a phone while driving, riding a bike, sledding, or even operating a rickshaw.

This talk of cell phone etiquette can serve to remind us what is rude and what is not.   And, in an age where lack of civility is commonplace and there can be a tendency to become self-absorbed, it can be helpful to us as believers in Christ to reflect on how we reflect His character.

I think if we had access to a portable camera through which we could actually see the way we behave, it would be quite telling.   Dr. David Hawkins refers to a "third eye" that could really be helpful as we evaluate the way we respond to our spouses.   If we could really see ourselves the way others see us, what sort of story would that tell?

We have to guard against the perils resulting from self-absorption.   I believe that the proper perspective based on Scripture is to take the attention away from ourselves and place it first of all on God Himself, and then allow His love and nature to flow from us, so that we develop a desire to be absorbed by Christ and sensitive to the people around us.   I really do think we should be the most polite people on earth, not only because that's how we should operate in a civil society, but because it demonstrates a God-honoring concern for others.    If we claim to know God, yet we repel people by our selfishness, then we could perhaps miss out on opportunities to compel people to know Him.