Cooped Up

Jesus has shown us the example of true, unselfish love - after all, He gave His very life so that we might come to know Him and have a right relationship with God the Father.  His love released in our
human relationships can help show us the way to meaningful interaction with others. John 15 says:
12 This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.
13 Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends.
14 You are My friends if you do whatever I command you.

Love for others, that is characterized by unselfishness and a heart of compassion and service, can be expressed through the power of the Holy Spirit and the love of Christ flowing through our hearts.  His direction can be activated and bring about right relationship - with God and with those around us.  If we are putting Him first, then we find that our motives are shaped by His principles and our actions are guided by His love.

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As believers in Christ, we can look for ways in which we can honor Him by entering into healthy relationships, as 1st Peter 4 directs:
8 And above all things have fervent love for one another, for "love will cover a multitude of sins."
9 Be hospitable to one another without grumbling.
10 As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.

A familiar chicken restaurant chain now has brought to some of its restaurants the idea of a chicken "coop."  But there's no chicken inside, rather it's a place that families can place their cell phones while they dine.

That's right, according to Atlanta television station 11 Alive, Chick-fil-A has created a family challenge in which customers surrender their cell phones to a cardbox coop, covered with instructions and a promise of a reward.

Here are the rules:

1. Turn all family cell phones to silent and place in this cell phone coop

2. Enjoy your Chick-fil-A meal and each other distraction free!

3. After the meal, let Chick-fil-A know that your family has successfully completed the challenge and each of you will receive a small Icedream cone.

The 11 Alive reporter posted a picture of the "coop" on his Facebook page, saying it was a great idea. And, apparently this concept has become quite popular.

So far, it's been rolled out in a selected number of stores.

On the FamilyLife.com website several years ago, writer Dave Boehi addressed the issue of cell phone usage and its threat to marital conversation.  He said:

The technology is evolving so quickly that most of us are barely aware of how our behavior is changing and our relationships are affected. As one reader wrote after I addressed this issue a couple months ago in a series of Marriage Memo e-mails, “These mobile devices can take over your life.” Another said, “I understand technology has its advantages, but we are being ruled by the technology rather than using it as a tool.”

Boehi shared some tips from readers regarding taming this cell phone monster.

1. No devices at the dinner table. This was mentioned many times in e-mails. Dinner time should be reserved for face-to-face conversation. There will be plenty of time after dinner to reply to phone calls and text messages.

One family calls this rule “TTT—Timeout from Technology at the Table.”

2. No phones at the restaurant. “My husband and I have made a deal for date nights,” wrote one wife. “He is way too plugged in to TV and his phone. Therefore when we are out at restaurants we are not allowed to use our phones unless it is a call from the babysitter. Also we do not go to restaurants that have televisions because he will be too distracted, and I will be mad that he is not totally engaged. We all need to find time daily to disconnect from all the information and reconnect with our families with good ‘old-fashioned’ conversation.”

Another reader said she and her husband leave their cell phones in the car before they enter a restaurant.

3. No texting or talking about really important personal issues over the phone.
This should be done face-to-face, unless it is something that can't wait. One reader said, “There is a huge gap in a 'conversation' when texting because you don't really fully understand what that person really means unless you hear the tone in their voice or see their face and a lot can be taken the wrong way, creating bad feelings, etc.”

Boehi notes that:

All these boundaries establish a strong family value: When you’re with someone, that relationship is your priority. Retraining will take some time if you, your spouse, or your children have become addicted to your devices. But keeping them in their rightful place will, in the words of one reader, “open up the door to more intimate communication with your spouse and family.”

In a summary on the website, CraigGroeschelBooks.com, about his book, #Struggles, there is this quote:

The more you compare, the less satisfied you are. The more we interact online, the more we crave face to face intimacy, but the harder it is to find. The more filtered our lives become, the more challenging it is to be authentic. The more information about the pain in the world we’re exposed to the more difficult it is to care.

Some takeaways for today:

First of all, we were built for interaction: with God our Heavenly Father and with other people. Human interaction, not technically-filtered interaction.  If our communication with God consists of engagement with a Bible app or an online devotional, or even listening to Faith Radio, that is wholly insufficient in light of what we could have with Him.  Those are great tools to help you experience God, but He would intend for those to be gateways to greater fellowship, not the fellowship itself. And, with people, we can be so consumed with our digital interaction that we lose the human experience.  We have to fight to get it back.

And, with everything in our lives that would threaten our vertical relationship with the Father and our horizontal relationship with family and friends, we have to make sure we are setting the proper boundaries and taking steps to guard against those insufficient alternatives we might encounter.  Kudos to Chick-Fil-A for promoting family unity and to pastors, speakers, and writers who have seen these threats and are helping to call attention to contributing factors to the decline of family communication and cohesion.