empower us to be obedient to God in controlling what we say. Proverbs 12 states this:
17 He who speaks truth declares righteousness, But a false witness, deceit.
18 There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, But the tongue of the wise promotes health.
19 The truthful lip shall be established forever, But a lying tongue is but for a moment.
If we want to demonstrate Godly wisdom working through us, it is important that we use God's resources in order to control our tongue. That includes, as James says, being "slow to speak." A Christian leader has written a column about not dropping "verbal bombs" on pastors right before they preach; and we can expand that concept to include not only authority in a variety of settings, but consistent practice in our interactions with others. We should be using our words to glorify God and should speak with clarity, conviction, and compassion.
The book of Proverbs contains a significant number of words on the subject of words - this illustrates
how the words we speak are so important. For example, here are a couple of verses in Proverbs 16:
23 The heart of the wise teaches his mouth, And adds learning to his lips.
24 Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.
The chapter begins with this verse:
1 The preparations of the heart belong to man, But the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.
Words can have such a profound impact on people - we see it in the home, in the workplace, and even the Church. The right heart, with the wrong words, can be counterproductive. The right words spoken with the wrong tone or at the wrong time can also have a negative effect.
And, sometimes we're better off just keeping our mouth shut.
Noted church leader Thom Rainer, who used to head LifeWay Christian Resources, illustrates how wrong words and the wrong time can be potentially devastating to a pastor. And, I think this should illustrate caution to all of us when considering whether or not to say something and certainly when and how to say it.
He writes at The Christian Post:
The point I want to make for all of us is that words matter. There is a way to offer what you could term "constructive criticism," if you really feel it's necessary. But, you have to consider timing, setting, and the content of your words. Think about it: how are these words going to be regarded? Will they be received in the way they are intended? Is my heart right and am I communicating in love or in vindictiveness? Our word count would probably be reduced if we exhibit the self-control that is listed in the fruit of the Spirit. We can allow the Spirit to control our tongue.
And, have you been on the receiving end of a "verbal bomb," perhaps especially before we have to perform a certain task? We have to double down and dig deep into the resources of the Spirit to put those hurtful words aside so that we are doing what we have to do effectively. It's a difficult task, but we can reject what weighs us down - at least temporarily, so that it doesn't negatively impact what God has called us to do.
The main takeaway from Rainer's column is found in the last two paragraphs:
+++++
The book of Proverbs contains a significant number of words on the subject of words - this illustrates
how the words we speak are so important. For example, here are a couple of verses in Proverbs 16:
23 The heart of the wise teaches his mouth, And adds learning to his lips.
24 Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.
The chapter begins with this verse:
1 The preparations of the heart belong to man, But the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.
Words can have such a profound impact on people - we see it in the home, in the workplace, and even the Church. The right heart, with the wrong words, can be counterproductive. The right words spoken with the wrong tone or at the wrong time can also have a negative effect.
And, sometimes we're better off just keeping our mouth shut.
Noted church leader Thom Rainer, who used to head LifeWay Christian Resources, illustrates how wrong words and the wrong time can be potentially devastating to a pastor. And, I think this should illustrate caution to all of us when considering whether or not to say something and certainly when and how to say it.
He writes at The Christian Post:
Frankly, I don’t see how most pastors make it to their sermons when they have been blasted by one of these bombs right before they preach. While three sentences are certainly not an exhaustive list, these are the three I hear most often.Number 1 is...
“People are saying . . .” This one is the coward’s special. Rather than speak for themselves, the critic hides behind the deceitful anonymity of other people.He adds, "Anonymous criticism is not valid criticism. It should be dismissed along with the messenger." The second one can also be discouraging:
“I love you, but . . .” The only thing the critic wants the pastor to hear is the verbiage after “but.” The only thing the pastor hears is the verbiage after “but.” The critic tries to couch his or her concerns from a posture of love and concern. Baloney!And, the third one, apparently relative to someone being disgruntled with a church: “I’m just not getting fed here.” Rainer writes: "Sometimes, the sentence is just a cover because the church member has a consumer mentality, and he or she has not received her preferences or has not gotten preferential treatment."
The point I want to make for all of us is that words matter. There is a way to offer what you could term "constructive criticism," if you really feel it's necessary. But, you have to consider timing, setting, and the content of your words. Think about it: how are these words going to be regarded? Will they be received in the way they are intended? Is my heart right and am I communicating in love or in vindictiveness? Our word count would probably be reduced if we exhibit the self-control that is listed in the fruit of the Spirit. We can allow the Spirit to control our tongue.
And, have you been on the receiving end of a "verbal bomb," perhaps especially before we have to perform a certain task? We have to double down and dig deep into the resources of the Spirit to put those hurtful words aside so that we are doing what we have to do effectively. It's a difficult task, but we can reject what weighs us down - at least temporarily, so that it doesn't negatively impact what God has called us to do.
The main takeaway from Rainer's column is found in the last two paragraphs:
Most church members are good church members. Most church members really love their pastors. The few exceptions, though, are incredibly painful exceptions for pastors. Please prayerfully protect pastors from these verbal bombs, particularly right before they preach.
You will be demonstrating true love for your pastor when you do.We have just come off Pastor and Staff Appreciation Month, and while this is a dedicated emphasis, by no means should we just make a concerted effort to affirm our spiritual leaders during October. We can be challenged to support those who are in spiritual authority over us. Words matter, and words can hurt - we have to make it our aim to be vibrant, contributing members of the body of Christ, and there is a Biblical and respectful way to express disagreement, even with those in authority.
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