A Spirit of Reconciliation

The impact of godly mothers can seemingly be seen everywhere.  Perhaps you can recount in your own life or have observed in the life of someone you know the product of a mother who was dedicated to the Lord and praying for her child or children.

Timothy was certainly one of those - Paul wrote in 2nd Timothy chapter 1:
3 I thank God, whom I serve with a pure conscience, as my forefathers did, as without ceasing I remember you in my prayers night and day,
4 greatly desiring to see you, being mindful of your tears, that I may be filled with joy,
5 when I call to remembrance the genuine faith that is in you, which dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am persuaded is in you also.

I came across a story that can communicate the willingness to reconcile a broken family relationship - in this case, a mother-daughter years-long rift that involved a daughter driving across the country to make things right.

The TODAY Show website told the story of Ashley Alnissa, who, at the age of 32, knew something was wrong in her relationship with her mother, but she wouldn't pick up the phone to call her mother, Dukezha Morris.

The website shared:

Alnissa began working nights as a security guard at a warehouse overlooking a cemetery. Alnissa had harbored resentment against her mother over what she calls a traumatic childhood that included abusive behavior committed by Morris’ then-boyfriend. Though she was angry with Morris, the thought of never seeing her again felt suffocating.

“When you’re staring at gravestones, it makes you think,” Alnissa recalls. “I asked myself, ‘Do I want to go the rest of my life without a relationship with my mom? And the answer was immediately, no.’”

As the story goes: 

A week later, Alnissa packed up her car and drove 37 hours from Covina, California, to Norfolk, Virginia, to surprise Morris. The emotional reunion, was captured on video and went viral on TikTok.

On Jan. 2, Morris was walking home from church when she saw Alnissa standing on the sidewalk with a big smile. Had God worked that quickly? Morris had spent the entire service asking for guidance and strength to heal the rift between her and Alnissa.

Morris took off running.

“I didn’t know I had it in me to run that fast!” Morris says.

The hug was filled with love and relief.

Now, Ashley and her husband are considering moving their family to Virginia to be near her mom. She relates: "I thought holding on to my anger made me strong, but once I let it go, I discovered true peace," adding, "Forgiveness is where the real power lies."

A Meeting House guest from last year's Christian Product Expo in Indiana wrote a few years ago about a reconciliation story between a mother and her daughter, both of whom have also been on The Meeting House on Faith Radio.

Julie Sunne stated on her website:

That relationship between a mother and daughter proves powerful yet unpredictable, especially in the teenage years when emotions tend to run high. Angry or hurtful words from either party spew all too easily, putting distance between a mother and daughter. And when a heart is wounded, restoration is needed.

The Lord is a god of restoration, and hope survives even when you doubt the relationship can.

She continued:

Maybe, despite everything you do, restoration with your mother or daughter remains elusive after years of trying. Hope still abounds, because pursuing restoration refines and transforms our own hearts, not simply those whom we desire a relationship with. Future generations will be positively impacted as we establish a healthy pattern of relating to those we love.

Julie went on to share about the story of Blythe Daniel and her mom, Helen McIntosh, who wrote about their relationship in a book called, Mended: Restoring the Hearts of Mothers and Daughters.  Julie shared:

Mended lays out a process of restoration and reconciliation. This important resource encourages mothers and daughters to seek common ground, choosing to value the relationship above differences, ask permission before offering advice, pose the right questions, and pray. Filled with personal stories of the authors’ own successes and failures, Mended keeps circling back to the importance of valuing the relationship above all else. Blythe explains that “the goal of our exchanges is restoration, not being right or wrong.”

Mother's Day, and Father's Day, as well, can be opportunities to consider these relationships between parents and their children.  If there is a need for reconciliation or for forgiveness, this can be a wonderful reminder.  And, even for those whose parents are no longer living, the Lord can minister a spirit of forgiveness and remove the root of bitterness spoken of in Hebrews. 

We can also recognize that any mother has been called to do incredible work for the Lord, being devoted in the sphere or spheres of influence to which God has called her, including her influential, nurturing role in the home.  As we embark on this week prior to Mother's Day, we can consider how we can effectively honor our mothers and recognize the incredible work that they have done, even though they may have been imperfect.  And, where there has been brokenness, we can come to the healer who desires to repair and restore.