One

God has provided for us not only incredible principles by which we order our lives, but wonderful people whom He brings into our lives for His purposes.  This includes our mates...in Hebrews 13, we read:

4 Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.
5 Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."
6 So we may boldly say: "The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?"

I think you can take away from this passage that God wants us to be content in our homes.  Not complacent in the life to which He has called us with or spouse, because He desires for us to grow in our love relationship between husband and wife.  I also believe that, with His help, we can reduce or eliminate those harmful factors that can divide us, that can cause misunderstanding, and generate conflict.  There are products of the past that can harm us, but through the Lord's goodness and forgiveness, He can help us become stronger in Him and with one another.

+++++

Our marriages are wonderful gifts of God, and reflect the relationship of Christ to the church, according to Ephesians 5:
31 "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh."
32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

One of the latest bits of celebrity news involves what some would consider "celebrity royalty" - the announcement that Angelina Jolie has filed for divorce from Brad Pitt.  A USA Today story reports that the couple has been "together" for 12 years, having been married for just two. The story relates that her attorney issued a statement Tuesday confirming that the decision was "made for the health of the family. She will not be commenting at this time, and asks that the family be given their privacy during this difficult time."

Later, according to the story, Pitt issued a statement to People, saying, "I am very saddened by this, but what matters most now is the well-being of our kids. I kindly ask the press to give them the space they deserve during this challenging time."

There seems to be no shortage of speculation about what could have happened, with another USA Today story spotlighting TMZ and People reports that Pitt is being investigated for child abuse, a contention that is being denied by the Pitt camp.  There are reports that the couple's split is due in part to a difference in parenting philosophy.

The Pitts worked together on the movie, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, while Pitt was still married to Jennifer Aniston.  They now have six kids - according to International Business Times, two were adopted before Pitt and Jolie became a couple.  They have three biological children, including a daughter born in 2006, and twins who were born in 2008, long before their wedding in 2014.

Brangelina have known for their involvement in social causes, but apparently faith-based charity is not a motivation.  According to The Inquisitr, Pitt grew up in a Christian home, but he describes himself as a combination of atheist and agnostic.  Jolie directed a film, Unbroken, about Louis Zamperini, and his daughter said she believes that the actress embraced faith while working on the movie, but in a later interview with the LA Times, Jolie appeared to be backing away from that.

On the surface, the chances for success for this couple did not appear to be very strong.  The seeds for their relationship apparently were planted and began to grow while Pitt was still married to someone else.  They met in 2004 and announced their first child together in 2006, but there was not a wedding until 2014.  They were an unmarried couple attempting to raise six kids.  Add to that the pressure of the movie industry and their celebrity status, and - well, you can see the narrative here.  Unfortunately, that's all too common, as high-profile people follow a trajectory that is quite different than the Biblical one - Brangelina engaged in a sexual relationship, had a child, actually multiple children, and then, after 10 years, got married in a secret ceremony.   And there does seem to be a lack of a faith foundation.

The LifeWay Christian Resources website, Facts & Trends, offers this insight on the potential longevity of couples who don't follow the Biblical pattern:

Couples who live together before getting married have a lower chance of having a long-term marriage than those who don’t live together, according to analysis by researchers at the Pew Research Center.

A woman who refrained from living with her husband prior to their wedding has a 57 percent probability her marriage will last at least two decades. Those who cohabitate decrease their probability to 46 percent.

For men, the more commitment is made prior to living together the more likely their marriages are to last. Those who live with their future spouse before even being engaged have the lowest chance of a long-term marriage at 49 percent. For those who wait until after marriage, they have a 60 percent chance of celebrating their 20th wedding anniversary.

Another factor to help solidify a marriage may be church attendance, as opposed to religious identification, according to sociologist Brad Wright. “Six in 10 evangelicals who never attend church had been divorced or separated, compared to just 38 percent of weekly attendees,” he says.

Research from W. Bradford Wilcox and Nicholas Wolfinger linked couples attending church together with happier relationships. Their study also found sharing friends at a congregation and praying together also increased the likelihood a couple was happy together.

Meanwhile, another Hollywood "power couple," whose relationship is on the rocks has seen an injection of faith into their relationship.  Jennifer Garner reportedly began to take her kids to church as a result of her involvement with the film, Miracles from Heaven, and the Daily Mail reports that recently, husband Ben Affleck was seen taking the children to church, as well, while Garner was away.   That story says that the couple has decided to co-parent and their divorce has not become finalized.

Marriage is the first institution created by God - His definition is very simple - one man and one woman united in a permanent bond - becoming "one flesh."  Marriage preservation is a Biblical idea. So, a couple should go into marriage with that idea of permanency, not a "try this out and see how it works."  I believe that cohabitation involves uniting one's soul and body to another outside of God's perfect plan - it is not a "trial run," rather it is a dangerous commitment that yields negative consequences on that relationship, as well as relationships in the future.  

And, in the pursuit of marriage preservation, it's important to identify those factors that can cause martial erosion.  It may be the errors involved with past relationships.  There may be different approaches to parenting that, if left unchecked, could lead to great division.  Each spouse brings his or her own unique set of personality traits into a relationship, as well as baggage that could be harmful if it is not dealt with.   We are called to build our marriages and homes on a strong foundation, and to build one another up in the Lord.