Love and Marriage

There's a certain level of intensity that we should possess for our marriages, recognizing that the family 
is an essential component of a well-functioning society. Ecclesiastes 9 states:
9 Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life which He has given you under the sun, all your days of vanity; for that is your portion in life, and in the labor which you perform under the sun.
10 Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might; for there is no work or device or knowledge or wisdom in the grave where you are going. 

When you read those verses together, you could conclude that God wants us to devote time and energy into building our marriages - "with your might," as verse 10 suggests.  Instead of fighting with one another, we can purpose to fight for our marriages against the cultural and individual threats that could destroy what God has placed together.  God intentionally connects two sinners together - a man and woman - so that they can love each other, fulfill His purposes, and glorify Him to a world that needs to see His light. 

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Marriage is such an important concept - established and ordained by God, representative of the relationship between His Son and His bride, the Church. And, Hebrews 13 provides this direction:
4 Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.
5 Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."
6 So we may boldly say: "The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?"

We certainly know that the institution of marriage has been threatened throughout the last few decades - significant rates of divorce, sinful behavior, such as pornography that can have a negative impact on the love relationship, couples who cohabitate, and a redefinition of marriage, have all chipped away at the institution in general. And, specific challenges in the culture have weighed down individual marriages. We need the Lord to be at the center of our marriage relationships, so that we can grow in our love for one another and so that our marriages can function in the way that He intends.

A new survey indicates that there is some good news in the area of marriage.  A ChristianHeadlines.com story indicates that the divorce rate in America in 2019 was the lowest it has been within the last 50 years.  The article states:

The new data shows that 14.9 marriages per 1,000 ended in divorce in 2019, a rate that is the lowest it’s been since 1970, according to an analysis by author Wendy Wang, director of research for the Institute for Family Studies. It’s even slightly less than in 1970 when it was 15.0, Wang wrote in an online analysis.

Regarding this data, from the U.S. Census Bureau’s American Community Survey, Wang states: “This is great news for Americans who are married,” adding, “It means that their marriages will likely be more stable, and their children will be more likely to grow up with two married parents, which provides them the best chance for success later in life.”

But, the data shows that the marriage rate has declined, as well, with only 33 out of every 1,000 unmarried adults getting married, according to Wang.  She also points out what she sees as a "marriage divide," writing:  “With the rates of both divorce and marriage dropping in America, we expect to see the marriage divide deepen and poor and working-class Americans increasingly disconnected from the institution of marriage...The impact of this disconnection on our family lives can be destructive, which makes it an issue that policymakers, community leaders, and scholars should continue to pay attention to.”

And, Wang anticipates that the divorce rate will decline during the COVID-19 pandemic. The article notes:

New data from the American Family Survey shows that 58 percent of married Americans say “the pandemic has made them appreciate their spouse more and half agree that their commitment to marriage has deepened,” Wang wrote.

“Moreover, initial data from some states suggest that divorce filings have indeed declined,” she wrote. “It is likely that divorce may increase a bit after COVID-19 because of the pent-up demands, but the overall decline in divorce appears to be a consistent trend.”

Even though the marriage rate and divorce rate have declined and there are those who don't believe in or understand the importance of marriage, still, we recognize, as it's been said, that marriage is a key building block of our society.  It was an institution ordained by God in Genesis, and intended to be foundational.  And, it's a representation of Christ and the Church - God holds marriage in high esteem.

He provides the tools for a marriage to last, even through conflicts and pandemics.  Married couples can navigate the challenges and uncertainties by gaining a sense that we are walking together, as a team, in unity, reliant on the Holy Spirit to help one another.

Marriage is an institution, a concept, that really can transcend societal factors - while Wendy Wang highlights the distance that she has seen between poor and working-class people in the U.S. and participation in marriage, we know that it brings love and stability into our lives, and should be promoted by those who are in positions of influence, including leaders in the Church.